Why I Stopped Emotionally Vomiting on People...and What to do Instead

Have you ever felt that venting your negative emotions to someone else only makes you feel worse? I once thought letting it all out to friends and family would help, but soon realized it was draining both them and me. In this episode, I share how embracing radical responsibility and changing my approach to processing emotions has transformed my mindset. We'll explore the power of reprogramming self-talk, like affirming a youthful vitality, and how rejecting blame and victimhood can unlock our creative potential and sharpen intuition.

But that’s not all. We’ll dive into some powerful tools for managing emotions and their significant impact on our mental and physical health.

Resources mentioned:

Unveiled - The Membership here. Lock in your $59 / month by July 31st.
Light it UP! - I'll personally help you clear dark energy.
Elevated Consciousness - podcast 
My podcast interview with Allie Ninfo here

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Chapters

• 0:00 The Power of Words and Emotions
• 10:14 Understanding Emotions and Energetics
• 21:22 Empowering Kids and Clearing Dark Energy

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome back to the show. So today I have a fun topic for you, and I'll do my best to keep it streamlined. I did not script this. It's something that's just been on my mind and I really want to share it with you because it's been helpful for me. So the topic is about the power of our emotions and our spoken words and how they affect not just you, but others as well.

Speaker 1: 0:25

So I'm currently not in a relationship, I'm not dating, but what I've done in the past is, in relationships, I have often blamed the other person. I've also used them, as well as friends or family members, as kind of like a venting soundboard. Right, if I had a bad day, I would just want to vent to someone. But what I didn't realize was actually happening is, when I was venting at them, I was bringing both of us down energetically, and so for the last year, energetically, and so for the last year a little bit more than a year I haven't been dating. I've had some situationships. I'll say I also don't have a friend group that I see in person. I have friends online and we chat, like over Instagram or WhatsApp. I have friends all over the world, but I don't vent to them. I'm very careful now to take an information first, process it and then share it from a place of higher frequency, higher vibration. So, as an example, I was feeling this was about two weeks ago. So, as an example, I was feeling this was about two weeks ago.

Speaker 1: 2:03

His podcast called Elevated Consciousness, and it's so funny because as he was talking, I was coming up with this idea before he even said it, which just shows it's like source channeled information. So he was talking about this very thing, about how, when we like unload on someone else, whoever's more rooted in their emotions, it's going to affect the other person. So if I were to be really angry or fearful and I was unloading my feelings to someone else, that would bring them. If I was more rooted than them, it would bring them down as well, and so my mission is to help raise the frequency of the world. So that's something I definitely don't want to be doing, for several reasons. I'm going to share a little bit about different aspects of how this works and then at the end, I'll give you some tips.

Speaker 1: 2:58

So another reason why I've chosen to not emotionally dump on people is because I've also taken a stance of radical responsibility, because literally everything that has happened in my life I have created in some aspect, whether consciously, unconsciously soul contract, reflection, and so when something happens, I know that there's something I can shift within that will shift things externally. And it took me a while to kind of wrap my brain around this. So if this sounds like really confusing or kind of like earth shattering, I get it. But it's also a really powerful stance, because when you take radical responsibility for being the creator of your life, then you literally can create your life. And so, being more conscious of the words that we speak, both out loud and in our minds, knowing that when you're speaking things, you are literally creating a program, you're like Knowing that when you're speaking things, you are literally creating a program, you're like writing out a little script, putting it into your creator field and then that creates your reality.

Speaker 1: 4:10

So, as an example of this, my mom, who's only 64, she's married to someone who's much older than her, and so she will often say, oh, I'm so old like blah, blah, blah, and I'm like you're literally nine years older than J-Lo, like J-Lo could have been my mom, and that and I try to remind her and I tell her as well, I'm like just by you saying that and speaking those words, you're going to start creating a life and situations that you don't want, right? If you keep saying, oh, I'm so old, blah, blah, blah, that's what's going to inform your creator field and it's going to say okay, she's old, let's start, you know, making her feel old. So for me, for the last five years I have been programming every day I'll repeat this multiple times I'm 29 years old biologically and physically, and I do that for several reasons. One, for health reasons. Two, I like the vibrancy of that, like that feels really good to me to just think I'm 29 forever. You know people think I have had Botox. I've never had Botox. I have very few like gray hairs. I'll get facials from different people and they will just be like wow, your skin is like so youthful. And then recently I had a bunch of blood work done and my doctor, who's a naturopath, she, was like wow, your hormone levels are like perfect. So it works. Like I literally inform myself every day I'm brainwashing myself that I'm 29 years old biologically and physically, and you can see it and other people can see it.

Speaker 1: 5:53

The other part of this is going back to the blaming. Okay, so I used to live in a place of blame and victimhood and really got a lot of power from having this like sob story, from all of the challenges I did face, which my soul, my higher self, like arranged all of that, designed all of that, because I wouldn't be where I am now if I hadn't gone through all of that. However, during the times where I felt I have no control over this again, I was literally programming my creator field and it was saying, okay, she has no control over this, so let's make sure she doesn't have any control. So then it can start shutting off your ability to actually create the life that you want. It can even shut down, like your third eye, your crown chakra, all things that connect you to your intuition, can even shut down, like your third eye, your crown chakra, all things that connect you to your intuition. So just being really, really conscious of the things that you're saying out loud and in your mind, not just about yourself, but about others too. So now I'll kind of get into the the steps of all of this and I apologize if it's kind of, if I'm jumping around. I just like to come on here and just share from the heart instead of scripting it out. I just like the flow of that, I just enjoy that. Sometimes I do script it, but other times or I'll make notes, but this time I didn't.

Speaker 1: 7:14

So the first step would be we are 50% human and we're 50% a spiritual being. So we're 50% physical, we're 50% energetic. Right, so we are going to experience some emotions. Neutrality is like my goal. That is my goal for myself, for my kids, for my clients. That is where the power is is being neutral. That doesn't mean we want to emotionally bypass though that. There's a huge difference there.

Speaker 1: 7:41

And I actually had this question in one of my programs and I'm so glad she asked that because I was doing an RRT clearing for them. And she asked me is RRT like emotional bypassing? And I said no, my own modality, where I've blended like unconscious reprogramming and energetics, but at that time I was doing like a very RRT type clearing. So and I think I've mentioned this before on my podcast but when you feel an emotion coming up, I'm going to like walk you through this. Okay, I'll walk you through exactly what I do. Let's say I have fear pop up, what I do. Let's say I have fear pop up. Actually, let's say I have anger pop up.

Speaker 1: 8:25

Someone did something I feel like was disrespectful. So immediately when I get that feeling, I first ask myself how do I feel like they're being? I feel like they're being disrespectful. I feel like they are not valuing me. Okay, so first I figure out what it is that I'm feeling like they're being. Then I look inside and I say where am I being like that to myself? Am I?

Speaker 1: 8:58

You know, lately I've been wanting to go to the gym and I actually was given two months free gym membership and I still haven't gone, and so I've been like catching myself being hard on myself for not going to the gym. I don't have a ton of free time right now because I take care of my son. He's only in part-time care, so I just keep telling myself I'll go once he's in school, in a few weeks. So I did catch myself being hard on myself I also. So I did catch myself being hard on myself. I also didn't feel like I was valuing my time. I was giving other people priority over myself.

Speaker 1: 9:29

So I kind of go through the different areas of my life, which there are eight, and I will figure out where I'm being that way to myself. Where am I disrespecting myself? Where am I not valuing myself? There's times where I just don't feel like posting on Instagram because I'm just not feeling in the vibe. And then I'll feel, and then I'll like be hard on myself because I'm like well, how are people going to find out about you if you're not even posting things? And so it's like this almost feels like an internal battle sometimes, but for good and so okay. So, going back to the person, I feel like they were being disrespectful to me, they weren't valuing me. Finding out where I'm doing that in my own life and then shifting that Okay, that's a huge piece of it.

Speaker 1: 10:14

Then what I found is there were three situations that were really bothering me and they were looping in my mind a lot, and that's how I know, okay, there's some open tabs here. I need to clear them. I did do some RRT on myself that helped bring it down a notch, but they were still just kind of hanging on, and so the episode I was listening to on elevated consciousness was all about, like, not venting to other people and bringing them down, and what he suggested was, you know, handwriting out what's bothering you, putting it on a note in your phone, and, as I was listening I was like, oh, I should do a voice note to myself. And then that was actually the third thing he said, because, honestly, I just don't love sitting there and writing like with a pen and paper. I used to love that and I think I did it so much that I don't know it. Just I feel like my mind works so fast I can't get out everything I want, and then my wrist starts to hurt. And then the notes on my phone. I'm always taking notes on my phone for classes, so I really just wanted something different, and so I pulled up a voice note and I literally just got everything out that I needed to get out, and this won't make you manifest what you don't want.

Speaker 1: 11:28

It's literally you have to get the emotions out. You have to get it out in whatever format, right? So I also do somatic work with the workout witch. I love her program I've done it several times where it's just like slow, gentle movements in different areas of the body. I do emotion code with my coach, danielle Taylor. I do RRT. I do all of these things that work really well together.

Speaker 1: 11:53

And then, of course, energetics. But we can't just like suppress them, because when you suppress emotions or feelings, then that causes issues in the body. So if I were to suppress these feelings, then something would happen physically, because your body is actually working for you, even though it can feel like it's working against you. It's actually just trying to give you a message and and this can be in many different ways, and I'll give you a few examples. So not too long ago, I was really worried about my future, like where am I going to live? All of these things I was really getting? I was just like thinking all the time about my future and like you know, what is my business going to look like? All of this stuff? And I started noticing some wrinkles around my eyes that hadn't been there before, and so wrinkles represent energetically, like worrying about the future and really just not being present, right, and so then I took the time to shift that energetically and emotionally and my wrinkles reduced. Okay, so that's just one example.

Speaker 1: 13:04

Another example is if you're carrying extra unwanted fat on your body in a specific area. All the different areas mean something else, so you might be trying to protect yourself from life or from love, or you just might not be trusting people, or if you're having issues with your throat, that can be like unprocessed anger, or it can be stuck creativity. Also, the jaw if you're feeling a lot of tension in your jaw, that's anger. If you're feeling pain in your shoulders, that is like putting too much pressure on yourself. So there's all these different areas of our body where it's literally trying to communicate to us and say hey, pay attention. So literally anything that you're feeling physically right now, there's an emotional and energetic component that if you shift that, you will feel better.

Speaker 1: 13:57

There is absolutely no reason that any of us should be carrying extra unwanted fat, you know, or even aging that's a whole different topic, but only like a small percentage of the population is actually even supposed to age. Like we don't even have the death program in our bodies. It's pretty crazy. It's all in our mind. Because when you start, like when people reach about the age 40, 45, 50, they'll say, oh, I'm having a senior moment. The more that you keep saying that to yourself'll say, oh, I'm having a senior moment, the more that you keep saying that to yourself, like, oh, I forgot my keys, I must just be getting old. Whereas if you forgot your keys at 18, you wouldn't be saying, oh, I'm having a senior moment, right. So it's like everything we say we are creating.

Speaker 1: 14:39

And so what I did, going back to the voice note is I literally just brought up each situation I talked about. First I just kind of got it out like this happened, this is how I feel, and I even let myself kind of blame them for a second, knowing I was going to switch that because it just felt good in the moment to do that. And then I was like okay, here's how they're being, here's where I'm being, like this to myself. I just kind of talked through it all on the voice note and I have not had those looping thoughts since. They have popped up once or twice, but like way less, way less. And I bet if I took the time to just do that again, they would probably be gone.

Speaker 1: 15:18

But a lot of us don't give ourselves the time to actually clear these things, we just suppress it, right? Or someone will say something to you that bothers you and you just think, oh, you know, your people-pleasing tendencies, your primal people Say that five times, your primal people pleasing tendencies will kick in and say, oh, we better not, you know, rock the boat. And so it's just completely different for me now Like I'll have friends that will talk about things, but it's usually like I won't just go to them venting and angry. I will process that first until I can like actually find some humor in it and then, you know, chat about it. But I'm I'm actually so glad that I've had this time to just be single and not be in a place where I have friends physically, where I'm like meeting them in person, because it's allowed me to really work on processing emotions on my own, not dumping them on others, and then really taking the time to like listen to my body.

Speaker 1: 16:21

So I had a pain in my neck last night and I know that energetically, that means that I'm not seeing both sides of something. And so there was a situation that I was thinking about earlier in the day and I was allowing my human self to kind of just take over and I was thinking, gosh, that person's so selfish, like kind of going on a little rampage. And that night, when I felt the pain in my neck, I was like, oh, I'm not looking at this from their perspective, because another way to kind of neutralize these emotions is to literally neutralize them. Like look at the positives and negatives, because there's always an equal amount of positives and negatives to something. So I looked at it from their perspective. I even took the stance of like acting like I was their attorney and arguing for them. And then I woke up my pain's gone in my neck.

Speaker 1: 17:11

So if you're experiencing issues in your body, definitely signs that your body's trying to communicate something to you, so you'll want to find whatever modality you like to process them out. If you need help with this, I have my membership, which only for today and tomorrow so July 30th and 31st it'll be $59 a month. Or if you purchase for the year, you get two months free and you get my new program called the Breakout Blueprint, which is all about breaking out of the corporate world. If that's something that applies to you, I mean everybody gets it if they pay in full. It won't just be about that. There will be audios on there like break out from procrastination, break out from lack of motivation, like all of those things. So it will be helpful for anybody. But I'm going to bump up the price of my membership to $77 a month starting in August, because it does take a lot of my time.

Speaker 1: 18:05

I'm recording an audio, at least one a month, a blend of unconscious, reprogramming and energetics, and then I'm also doing a live call once a month for 45 minutes. We get on. You can ask me anything, and so in that program there's already a ton of audios that you could go listen to and start learning how to neutralize your emotions. One last thing on this is when we are experiencing these lower frequency emotions, like anger and fear, we are attracting dark energy, and so that's a whole different topic. Definitely go check out Elevated Consciousness podcast. He has some great ones on dark forces.

Speaker 1: 18:47

I've actually been trained by Ali Ninfo on dark forces and I have a coaching program right now where I'm just helping them, looking at their energy, telling them what's on them and telling them how to clear it. So right now you can join that. It's still in a beta phase because I am not an expert in dark forces yet. I'm just sharing what I know and I have been really successful clearing myself, clearing my kids, clearing the people that are in that program. So I kind of wanted to do that first before I announced it anywhere. So that program right now is only $1.99 and you'll actually get like seven or eight check-ins with me on telegram. It's actually I will be bumping that up to like probably $1,200 at some point, but for right now I'm still learning. I feel like that's a fair price and I'll be continuing to add to it as I master dark forces. But I have had a lot of fun learning about them and helping people clear them.

Speaker 1: 19:56

I check myself every day for them. I check my kids, but then I also have to check in with their higher self if I can clear them. So when I check in on my son, I usually 100% of the time can clear him because he's only four. My nine-year-old it's been. Sometimes I can, sometimes I can't. My teenager it's always well. No, there was one time where she was going through a really tough time and her higher self actually let me clear them for her. But just like there's light in the universe this is a universe of balance there's also dark.

Speaker 1: 20:29

So what I've noticed is that a lot of spiritual teachers are only focusing on the light. They're not actually addressing the dark, and that's where we see a lot of people fall. A lot of people who started out as really high vibrational light beings helping the world. Then they got consumed by dark energy, dark forces and then they end up falling. I'm kind of seeing that happen right now and it's really devastating because they did have so much to give to the world. We just don't talk about this like in the US. I know Alessandro says like in other countries they start talking about dark energy, dark forces, when the kids are really young. So it's like totally normal in other countries, but in the US, well, I know why. But yeah, it's just not something that we're taught.

Speaker 1: 21:22

I am teaching my kids because I want them to feel empowered, because when you have dark energy on you, it can make you feel foggy, it can make you feel like you're in your own little hologram world, it can make you feel depressed, it'll amplify your anxiety, anything and so if you don't know about this, then you won't know how to clear it off right. I know that my higher self wants me to master dark forces, dark energy, to help others and help others see that it's not scary Like Hollywood likes to make it scary. Go listen to my podcast interview with Allie Ninfo. If you haven't yet, I'll link it in the show notes. But it's not scary, it's actually like really fascinating to me but's very real.

Speaker 1: 22:04

So if you have any questions about that, reach out or I will link the program in the show notes, if you're interested in checking that out, because at some point I won't be able to charge $199 because I'll have too many people checking in with with me, so I'm just energetically allowing myself. At first it was $99. Now it's $199. It'll just keep getting bumped up as I'm mastering, as I'm learning. So I hope this was helpful for you. Reach out if you're not sure where to start and I am happy to help you. So have a great week.